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Long overdue entry [22 Mar 2007|03:29pm]
Lolz... I haven't made an entry for 9 months. Is anyone still there? I've still been reading everyones entries I just can never be arsed to make an entry.

So I'm going to Serenity: Infinity starfury con in October which is gonna be ace. Just wondering if anyone else on my friends list is going? Haven't been to a convention in aaaaaages! So it's gonna be quite cool to embrace my inner nerd somewhat.

Other than that I haven't really got anything else to update people with. Life is as usual. Essays, work, essays, work. Lol. Not a lot else going on really. Oh and its my birthday next week! woo! 20!

So yeah... I guess it'll be another 9 months for another entry. :D
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[16 Jul 2006|11:04pm]
An update of sorts, although probably a short one as I've just put an Alias DVD in to watch.

So my Spring Semester results arrived last week, I passed 3 of my modules with a B (2:1). And 4th module for that semester I failed, utterly and completely. As a result of not turning in my coursework, so it's not like it was unexpected. Since the results have been published I started revising straight away, probably would have been a better idea if I had done that the first time round but oh well.

A family friend died the week before last. The funeral is tomorrow. He was a diabetic and had been fighting with it for a long time, he'd had a shitty few years with dyalisis (sp?) and had started to go blind, but things had started to look up this year and then he had a heart attack. He was the same age as my Dad. 41. Kinda scary really. I hadn't actually seen him for years because of the health troubles he was having but I still remember him from when I was a kid since he used to live here.

Umm, not a lot else to update on really. Been the usual stuff with work. Going out and drinking too much, but there's not a lot else to do. I'm gonna calm it down now I think though, I mean one after work aint so bad but I'm not gonna make it a piss up every single night anymore. Martin is annoying as usual, it's all so on and off with him. Sometimes he's completely bearable and I dont mind being around him but other times I can't stand him. It's so annoying!

Film work is going kind of slow. I'm more focused on work and uni, those are my priorities right now but I am going to Bex's on Tuesday to do some editing stuff. I've already copied it all onto my laptop and started cutting it into clips but haven't put any clips together yet. No idea when we are going to shoot the remaining scenes either, I know the locations it's just getting a time when the locations will be available (my house is cool during the day, but the shoots we need are night shoots, although we might be able to get away with it. I shall maybe do a couple of test shots in the rooms we are shooting in before I go to Bex's.)

That's all really. Not a lot else going on in life. Exciting eh.
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[23 Apr 2006|03:29am]
Dear NHS,
If possible could you please put me on the waiting list for a new liver. I think I'm going to need one soon and would like it to be ready for when this one dies.
Thank you Mr. Doctor Man.

Seriously, I am drinking waaaaaay toooooooo much alcohol.

Last Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday - Obscene amounts of alcohol.
Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday - Admittedly no or very little alcohol (I had like one at home over the entire 3 days).
Today and Yesterday - Swore I wouldnt go out. Even went as far as not taking a change of clothes to work with me, and still I went out lol!

Then the plans for the week get even better....

Tomorrow - Somewhere on festival, probably Diva/Ignite for Danielle's Bday celebrations.
Monday - Pizza Hut with Cat/Carl then to Traci's for drinks before Jaks!
Tuesday - LUTON!
Wednesday - SOUTHEND!
Thursday - Underwear Night at Ignite.

Friday and Saturday night, admittedly I am working. BUt then that didn't stop me this weekend.

Damn alcohol!

Need sleep also....
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[20 Apr 2006|12:23am]
So Pizza Hut was fun. I miss Tillbrook, Alex, Cummins and Vicki. Especially when we all get together. We're gonna go round Alexs tomorrow I think to watch Serenity and play Magic and generally be geeks for a couple of hours. Should be fun. And makes a change from the usual Thursday night which usually involves copious amounts of alcohol, dancing, nandos and watching the boys bowl.

After Pizza Hut last night Dan (my ex, not Tillbrook or Cummins) managed to piss me off. The 5 of us went over to the bowl cos we had nothing else to do and didn't fancy the pub, and we started bowling and Dan came over and was like "Oh I finish in 5 minutes" and he got himself put on the lane next to us, and basically hung around with us for the rest of the night. Now I wouldn't of minded if he had asked, but I was out with my friends and he just assumed he could tag along. I may be making a big deal out of it but it just annoyed me slightly.

Today was productive! I went to uni to meet up with Nas and Matt so we could get on with our group presentation thats due in Monday that we haven't even started! And we totally aced it. It was an easy topic anyway, because me and Tom had already done presentations on the topic at A Level (just on diff Directors). Nas had already done a ton of research so it was just a case of going through it and picking the stuff out we needed. I got designated as typist, Nas was doing it at first, and I was like hang on a sec and took over to change something and he was like "Wow, you type fast. You can do it now" lol. I don't even type that fast though! After we'd sorted the presentation out we headed off home. I got a Subway on the way! I miss the perks of uni, subway being one of them!

Then off to work. Fairly uneventful. I got free pizza. That was pretty much the highlight. OH AND THE VENDING MACHINE HAS STOPPED SELLING MY JUICE. I'd write a letter of complaint to the manager, but I don't think he'd care. I refuse to drink the crappy juice it's been replaced with though.

Just a footnote to remind myself at the weekend to buy;
-A new scart lead
-Danielle's Bday Present and card
-Something for the twins for easter (yes I know it's late but there down this weekend and not the one just gone for some reason)

And Chocolate Custards! My parents forgot to get them with the weekly shop! :O
2 comments|post comment

[18 Apr 2006|03:08pm]
Man do I feel rough. I am soooo taking it easy for the next month! lol. Traci invited me out with her mates last night, her other half came n picked me up n we went back to hers and drank Wine and Archers (not together), both of these things get me very very drunk very very quickly, which is why I don't drink them often. Anyhow, got to Jaks, met her mates which were a right laugh. Danced, drank more. Lots of VK Blue. And shots of tequilla (tastes like soggy feet without the damned salt and lemon/lime) and cola flavoured Corkys! Bumped into Anne Louise and Tom which was pretty cool. Got hold of their mate Craig which pissed off this girl Cheryl that we all know (used to go out with Dave) cos she liked him, but I didn't know at the time. Also bumped into Jack Pooley who I used to go to school with, and ended up getting hold of him too at the end of the night! :S I'm soooo bad. There was also some other random guy at the beggining of the night when I was less drunk that was cooing over my tongue bar, so I kissed him too. All in all, was definitely a mad night.

Off to Pizza Hut tonight with Tillbrook, Vicki, Alex and Cummins. We're supposed to be going to the pub after but I think I wont be touching the juice lol. Hair of the dog may have been working for the last 5 days, but my liver and kidneys are crying out to me to stop now.

I've missed this. The simple getting drunk or even just hanging with you're mates and not having the stress and complications of relationships getting in the way. I feel happy and balanced. Go me.
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[17 Apr 2006|07:04pm]
I think yesterday was quite possibly one of the best days I've had in a while. The only downside to the whole day or night was the stuff with Danielle but even that I didn't let get to me. I woke up at like midday and my parents went off to do the shopping, but came back like half an hour later cos literally everywhere was closed. Which btw, never ever happens... I used to work in a supermarket and we were open easter sunday so why has everyone decided to shut this year? Anyway, so there's absolutely no food in the cupboards so my dad decided we'd go for a roast down the pub. Went to the Haywain. My parents were getting on great, we all had a nice family day out and there was absolutely no arguing. I really enjoyed it. Just having a laugh together.

Then we headed back home and I started getting ready for the Ikon school disco, I ended up burning a hole in my trousers so I was like half n half. The top half of me was school girl but I had to wear black jeans cos my other trousers were in the wash lol. Adrian came over to get ready and we got to the bowl at about half 8. Mike, Dave, Tash and Rochelle were there too. We went over to Ikon pretty early, cost us a tenner to get in each! Was a bit of a slow night at first, and it took me bloody ages and cost me bloody loads to get drunk, and even by the end of the night I could still stand to have a few more rounds before I actually felt properly drunk.

Anyway had a laugh, they were giving away loads of sweets, like dolly beads, and lollys n stuff. So I put loads of dolly beads in Adrian's beer whilst he weren't looking. N me and Dave were flicking dolly beads at each other. Me and Rochelle actually got on pretty well without Dan there winding either of us up. Some random guy just grabbed me and kissed me at one point. Me and Adrian jumped around to rock music. I gave Ad (Danielle's ex) some kind of a lap dance (I say some kind of a lap dance because everyone else jumped on top of him when i did lol so it was more like a bundle). We did the Okey Cokey(sp?)!!! Was lots of fun! And for the most part me and Danielle didn't seem to ruin each others nights, in fact I thought we were getting along pretty well until the end of the night when she got funny with me again.

Apparently, Adrian tried talking to her about it but she wasn't very responsive. But I wasn't gonna and am not gonna try n sort things out for a while at least anyway. She told Adrian "Not to lecture her". It just annoys me that she'll come out with random things to me like "OMG, I just snogged some random fit guy down there" but when I want to talk to her about something she doesn't want to know. But I didn't let her get to me at all, because I was having too much fun with Adrian, Becca and Dave.

Me and Adrian walked home n stopped off for a kebab, apparently I'm glaswegian because I have tomato sauce on my kebab. Stupid random drunk guys! Then we passed Gemma's house n thought we'd go wake her up at 3.30am HAHA!

We are so mean!

In other news, Dave B at work has asked me out. I don't really know what to say. Bless him though. He's a laugh and everything, and I kinda saw this comign because he was asking me loads of questions the other day when I went out with Dan and Carl. And he was just like "So are you and Dan back together then?" and then he asked for my number a few days after that. N was all flattering me over text. And then he text me asking me to come out with him sometime this week.

On the one hand, even if I did like him, I can't go out this week anyway. I'm working Weds and Fri, Out tonight and tomorrow night. That leaves Thursday which i'm pretty sure he's working... N i need at least one night off anyway to get a little uni stuff done. But yeah, I suppose I need to let him down gently... I just don't really know how to. Suggestions? He's probably thinking I'm ignoring him or something anyway because I haven't text back for ages now. :S
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[17 Apr 2006|06:56pm]
spoilt meme

(1) your own cell phone
(2) a television in your bedroom
( ) an iPod
( ) a photo printer
( ) your own phone line
(3) TiVo or a generic digital video recorder
(4) high-speed internet access (i.e., not dialup)
( ) a surround sound system in bedroom
(5) DVD player in bedroom
(6) at least a hundred DVDs
(7) a childfree bathroom
( ) your own in-house office
( ) a pool
( ) a guest house
( ) a game room
( ) a queen-size bed or larger
( ) a stocked bar
( ) a working dishwasher
( ) an icemaker
(8) a working washer
( ) more than 20 pairs of shoes
( ) at least ten things from a designer store
(9) expensive sunglasses
( ) framed original art (not lithographs or prints)
( ) Egyptian cotton sheets or towels
( ) a multi-speed bike
( ) a gym membership
( ) large exercise equipment at home
( ) your own set of golf clubs
( ) a pool table
( ) a tennis court
( ) local access to a lake, large pond, or the sea
( ) your own pair of skis
( ) enough camping gear for a weekend trip in an isolated area
( ) a boat
( ) a jet ski
( ) a neighborhood committee membership
( ) a beach house or a vacation house/cabin
( ) wealthy family members
(10) two or more family cars
( ) a walk-in closet or pantry
( ) a yard
( ) a hammock
( ) a personal trainer
(11) good credit
( ) expensive jewellery
( ) a designer bag that required being on a waiting list to get...
( ) at least $100 cash in your possession right now
( ) more than two credit cards bearing your name (not counting gas cards or debit cards)
( ) a stock portfolio
(12) a passport
( ) a horse
( ) a trust fund (either for you or created by you)
( ) private medical insurance
( ) a college degree, and no outstanding student loans

Do you:
( ) shop for non-needed items for yourself (like clothes, jewellery, electronics) at least once a week
( ) do your regular grocery shopping at high-end or specialty stores
( ) pay someone else to clean your house, do dishes, or launder your clothes (not counting dry-cleaning)
( ) go on weekend mini-vacations
( ) send dinners back with every flaw
(13) wear perfume or cologne (not body spray)
( ) regularly get your hair styled or nails done in a salon
(14) have a job but don't need the money OR (I have been working purely to fund my social life as my student loan/nan was covering every other aspect of my life)
( ) stay at home with little financial sacrifice
( ) pay someone else to cook your meals
( ) pay someone else to watch your children or walk your dogs
(15) regularly pay someone else to drive you (taxis)
( ) expect a gift after you fight with your partner

Are you:
( ) an only child
( ) married/partnered to a wealthy person
( ) baffled/surprised when you don't get your way

Have you:
( ) been on a cruise
(16) traveled out of the country
(17) met a celebrity
( ) been to the Caribbean
(18) been to Europe
( ) been to Hawaii
( ) been to New York
( ) eaten at the space needle in Seattle
( ) been to the Mall of America
( ) been on the Eiffel tower in Paris
( ) been on the Statue of Liberty in New York
( ) moved more than three times because you wanted to
( ) dined with local political figures
( ) been to both the Atlantic coast and the Pacific coast

Did you:
( ) go to another country for your honeymoon
( ) hire a professional photographer for your wedding or party
(19) take riding or swimming lessons as a child
( ) attend private school
( ) have a Sweet 16 birthday party thrown for you

19. Not too spoilt then lol.
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[15 Apr 2006|03:08am]
Why is it she can make me feel so fucking shitty about myself in one fucking look? I'm fucking sorry I care about her. Because that's obviosly not what she wants. She doesnt want friends. otherwise she wouldn't treat them like fucking shit.

I'm making the damn effort you know, to give her the space like everyone is saying, but not totally ignoring her. And all I get in return is funny looks and snarky comments. And this is why I try to never form close friendships with girls, because it's all catiness and bitchyness and I'm tired off it.

It's just so damn annoying, I miss the not having someone there to text at 3am in the morning about random shit. Who do I rant to about Dan being an idiot? Who do I share all my new gossip with? I want that back. And it's not whatever she thinks I want back... she obviously has it into her head that I want more from her than friendship because she's treating me like an ex. She's treating me like she's treating Simon. And it's really fucking annoying that she wont listen to anything I say or text. I just wanna shout at her and tell her she's being an idiot, but then I look like the bad guy.

Grrr, I don't know what to do. At the moment we're still more or less talking, but I think thats more for the sake of our mutual friends than anything else. But even they are beggining to notice the tension between us.

I just don't understand. It all seems so pointless.

And yes I know that theres a possibility she can read this and I hope she does. Because she doesn't read or listen to anything else I say.
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[11 Apr 2006|11:42pm]
So everything kinda sucks again.

Went to do the nandos thing as usual on Thursday n Danielle was like super quiet. Earlier in the day I'd been chatting to Bex and Carl about my party and me crying and not remembering why, so when I was hanging around reception like I usually do I brought that up so we had something to talk about and she just snapped at me, and was like "You cry for no reason all the fucking time" which really hurt, so I snapped back "You can bloody talk" and basically since then she's back to ignoring me. Saw her in Ikon Saturday night after work, said hello, she kept wandering off, not that I minded cos I think she was in there with other friends anyway, but she was just a lot quieter than usual so when we were both on the same shift Sunday night I asked her what was going on, and she's just like "It's weird. Don't you think things are weird?" I was like, well yeah, I can see why it's weird about Simon but why me, why are things weird with me? And apparently I'm being weird around her with guys?!!! I mean seriously, get over yourself. It really pissed me off, so we ended up getting into an arguement at work. And I pretty much avoided her for the rest of the night. I sent her a text later that night, the balls in her court now. If she wants to sort things she knows where she can get in touch with me.

It's just so frustrating, on the one I hand I know she's purposefully pushing everyone away, and I am really worried about her, but on the other hand the way she has handled things the past week or so have really pissed me off and upset me.

Anyway, disciplinary was fine. Just got a verbal warning. Traci got sacked that same night, which sucked. So I was all ready to hand my notice in cos lets face it, no danielle, not on best of terms with dan, no traci... cat leaving in may... it just didn't seem worth staying especially with management being how they are. However, Sarah rang me last night saying she had an interview over there, and she got the job!! She's gonna try n get put in the cafe n her induction is this Friday whilst I'll be working, so yay! Gonna stay a bit longer now, at least until Cat's maternity leave anyway. Probably look for a new job in the summer after I've got my uni coursework outta the way.

Went Jaks Monday night with Vicki, was a bit slow at first, but nice to talk to her about stuff (mostly me ranting about Danielle but was definitely needed). Saw Faye in there and danced for a while, then bumped into Lawrie in the loo's n said hey! She was all jet lagged bless her. Danielle came in the toilets whilst we were there too and didn't say a word, so I'm guessing she still doesn't want to sort things out. Which means tomorrow at work is gonna be ohsofun!

Went Lakeside today n bought Tomb Raider: Legends. And Carly paid for me to get my bday pressie, I bought The OC season 1, cos I got S2 already. Alias was like 50 quid, but I still wanna get the rest of the boxsets, so if anyone see's em cheap let me know. Oh and apparently Buffy Season 7 has been discontinued til 8th May, which sucks. I also bought Fight Club for £2.99!! And City of God for our uni presentation.

Arranging to go out on Thursday to Ikon with lotsa people. Since it's Good Friday the next day its gonna be packed. So far persuaded Carl, Tillbrook, Vicki and Lorna. Will ask people at work when I'm in tomorrow, although it'll be cool to have a less work orientated night. Still be nice if Dan will come, cos I miss his friendship, n I think I'm in a better frame of mind now for us to be that.
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[06 Apr 2006|12:54am]
I've got a disciplinary! Yay! lol. I knew I wouldn't manage to leave that place without getting at least one, especially when everyone else has one (even Carl!) hehe. It's for a shift on Friday that I didn't realise I was working, I was informed of it in the morning by Dan, but had already made plans for the evening I didn't wanna give up, so I gave them some cock and bull story about being at uni shooting film for my coursework and couldn't get away until 10pm that night because we needed night shoot shots. Sarah who I spoke to in the morning told me off for not checking the rota but said she would find some cover and that would be fine. However, at 7pm when I was at home, they rang the house phone. My parents were unaware of my cover story and happily retrieved me from my bedroom. Julie Ann was like "where are you?" and I explained the conversation I had in the morning with Sarah and she was like "Well are you coming in then?" so I was like "WEll I'm pretty tired" And she was like "Oh, well enjoy your weekend off then" and hung up. I proceeded with my plans and went out and got wrecked, but someone must've accidently mentioned I was out to management because it says on my disciplinary notice that I was "seen on the park until late." Oh well, it's not a sackable offence, and I really couldn't give a shit that I screwed her over. hehe.

Friday night at Jaks was fairly fun. Well the first half of the night was anyway. Lots of me and Danielle making Dan, Simon and Lee as jealous as possible. And then everything kicked off between Simon and Lee, and lee's mate started getting involved and lots of arguing and shouting happened and Simon got kicked out. Which I don't think was entirely fair, but I know they were just doing their job. N it was easier for them to kick just Simon out than kick out Lee and his mate.

Saturday night was mad! I don't actually remember most of it. I remember the good stuff, the dancing, the body shots, the puff. And then I black out and don't remember the crying, the puking and the upsetting Danielle. However, I am never ever touching Tequilla again, there is still some left in the bottle, and even now, 3 days later the smell of it is making me feel sick.

Sunday was lazy day. lol. Tillbrook and Vicki came round and cooked a roast for us bless em. Thank you for that guys. Twas lovely! We cleared up and watched Harry Potter. I fell asleep near the end. Tried to go to bed really early but didn't work cos I was tossing and turning trying to remember what I had done to upset Danielle. When I did eventually fall asleep I had one hell of a freaky nightmare that I'm still not sure was a nightmare and not me seeing a ghost, but basically there was this black person shaped thing above my bed. First it was floating, and then I could feel weight on top of me, and then it dissapeared and I could feel my pillows moving underneath my head (could have been me tossing and turning that caused that though) and the black person shape was standing beside my bed. Then I swear that I got up at told my sister I'd just seen a ghost, but my sister swears that she never spoke to me. Which is what leads me to believe it was a nightmare not an actual ghost sighting. However it still freaked me the hell out, so I switched on all the lights to go make myself a drink and calm down before I went back to bed. Danielle reckons it coulda been the weed made my head go loopy.

Monday, more laziness. Me and my sis just hung around the house doing jack shit all day, my sister went and bought my Dad's bday present and when she got back we watched the party video (after I finally found the tape). Mucho amusement such as Cummin's putting a bowling pin to bed, cummins pee-ing, cummins confessing his love to an answering machine, chavs "dancing", my sister trying to do the "my mum is japanese" rhyme thingy, and lots of dancing. After that I went to Hollywood Bowl to see Danielle who had been sent home, so I rang her instead and got her to come to mine so we could talk. Ended up being quite a short "talk", ended up showing her the party video, eating choccy fingers n jelly beans all night. And then texting Adrian mean girl texts cos he was playing her and my sister around. We went to the kebab van at like 4am, cos we all fancied chips. It was pretty random n fun. But I still think Danielle's being kinda distant with me.

Tuesday, again laziness (it's like my middle name lol). I got up well late. Sat around watching telly for a few hours and then started getting ready to go out to the pub with Becca and Rachel. Got up there and had a few drinks, told them that I'd got in touch with Adrian again at the weekend and they were like "get him up here" so I rang Danielle and Adrian cos they were out drug hunting and told them to come down to the Quays. Now I'd promised Danielle I could get gear off Becca's boyfriend if she wanted it, so she asked me to get some sorted. So I rang Lee (Becca's boyf) and he said he could meet us in town in an hour or so (this was at like 9) so I sent countless texts to Danielle AND Adrian telling them they needed to get there asses back to Basildon if they wanted it. And they fucked me around all night with texts like "oh can't talk now. busy" and just generally not answering my calls. By the time they turned up Lee was pissed off with being fucked around and told them no. He'd already gone to bed anyway. So yeah, that kinda pissed me off too. Adrians pretty much a prick. N I've warned my sister not to get attached too him. Especially since the whole "I can get you drugs" thing he was telling Danielle was total bullshit so he could try his luck with her cos otherwise he'd have got them and they wouldn't have needed me and Lee.

And then today, I worked. Pretty uneventful apart from my disciplinary notice.

Tomorrow Nandos and hopefully if I can persuade someone (I'm not really fussed who as long as they can drink and dance) Ikon too.

Friday working again. Plus disciplinary. I'll probably LJ friday night or saturday morning again about that.

Things are pretty much back to normal. Oh Yay.
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[25 Mar 2006|08:27pm]
ok so updates have been sparse, and i really don't have anything in particular to say, just a general, whats going on update really. Otherwise I would have left this til after my birthday and there would be too much to update lol.

- Got uni results back. CCCB. Two of the C's are 2 marks from B's. So I'm pretty happy with that considering my effort was less than 100% last semester.

- Documentary for Factual Production is coming along nicely. John has put a hell of a lot of time into getting us the access to the Amateur Boxing Association, but now we have full access to all london boxing clubs to film all the 2012 hopefuls. We start filming on Monday but I don't think I'm going. I'm just gonna log the footage and do the editing afterwards. But still pretty exciting to be doing something serious.

-Danielle got the sack. It's all really stupid and petty and basically because half of management are two-faced bi-atches. But it'll be good for her to do something more with her life cos she was too good for that place.

-Me and Dan have split up. Basically, I brought up the fact that he was being weird with me (I knew full well why, because he thought I was sleeping with Lee, but I wanted to hear him say it) and he skirted around the issue for ages and then just completely turned everything around and was just like "yeah you're right, i'm not happy either. let's go back to being friends" and that was it. He just switched back like that. This happened Friday before last, it was a bit touch and go last weekend in terms of keeping myself together but I've had the week to distract myself with other things. Uni work mostly. But yeah, it still pisses me off that he still hasn't said the reason he was acting funny was because he doesn't trust me. He's told just about everyone else, except me. It just pisses me off he doesn't give me a real reason, just says "that's it" and I'm supposed to go along with it. However, that said, I can do without the hassle of a relationship right now, so if he starts fucking with my head and saying he wants me back AGAIN the answer is no. He had his 2nd chance, you don't get thirds.

-I'm gonna start looking for another job. Updating my CV as soon as this entry is done. What with Cat going in 6 weeks time, Danielle in 3 weeks. Me and Dan not together anymore. Doesn't really give me any reason to stay. There's only Carl then, and it's not like we're gonna lose contact if I don't work there or something.

Anyhow, signing off...

Kayleigh x x

Don't forget, party at my house. April 1st! (No it's not an april fools joke)
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random meme-age as a result of procrastination and boredom [14 Mar 2006|11:52pm]
*Relationship Survey*
Are you currently in a relationship?:yes
Are you happy with it?:yes and no... it could be better
When you meet a good person, do you fall fast?:not always, depends on other things
Have you ever cheated on anyone?:it does depend on your definition of cheating, but by my definition. no.
Is there any circumstances when cheating is ok?:again what is your definition of cheating. if the relationship isn't monogomous then it isn't technically cheating.
Would you ever take someone back if they cheated on you?:i have. although he had to grovel. a lot.
Have you talked about marriage with another person?:yes.
How many children do you want to have?:none yet. don't really know how many in the distant future.
Would you consider adoption?:yeah
Do you think love at first sight exists?:i hope so.
Are you romantic?:not really.
Do you believe that you can change someone?:if they are willing to be changed yes.
Where do u want to get married?:don't have a clue
Sex buddies: good or bad?:good if both parties are fully aware that the arrangement is sex only and no other feelings become entagled in it. eh danielle? ;)
Do you easily give in when you are fighting?:no.
Do you have feelings for someone whether they know it or not?:no.
Have you broken a heart?:yes.
what would happen if you found a person in bed with your boy/girlfriend?:i'd probably walk straight back out.
Would you ever fight somebody over your boy/girlfriend?:i'd fight rochelle. :D
How many people have you told you love them romantically?:3
How many people have told you that they love you romantically?:3
What do you have to say about your ex's?:*shrug* thats an odd question i don't really know the answer to. they were wonderful people, but it couldn't work out.
Take this survey | Find more surveys
You've been totally Bzoink*d

1. When you look at
yourself in the mirror, what's the first thing you look at?
my face usually... since thats the thing staring back at me.

How much cash do you have on you?
zilch, its all in the bank. unless you count my pennies.

3. What's a word that rhymes
with "TEST"?
Breast. What?

4. Favorite planet?

5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone?
Value Cars ringback.

6. What
is your main ring tone on your phone?
My Humps

What shirt are you wearing?
Joggers and Nightwatch t-shirt

8.Do you "label" yourself?
i try not to. i dislike labels immensely.

9. Name the brand of your shoes you're currently wearing?
Not wearing shoes

10.Bright or dark room?
which do i prefer? or which am i in? cos i prefer dark rooms but am in a bright room.

13. What were you doing at midnight last night?
sleeping. for once. usually i'm still up at midnight.

14. What did your last text message you received on your cell say?
"Poor Robin. LOL" In reply to my text to Mike saying if we all booked the same night off work then the cafe would be Robin and Vince.

16. What's a saying that you say a lot?

17. Who told you they loved you last?

18. Last furry thing you touched?
*snigger* errm, there was something furry under my bookcase when i cleaned out my room yesterday. i'm not quite sure what it was and i tried not to touch it. other than that, one of the stuffed toys at the end of my bed.

19. How many Drugs Have You Done In The Past three Days?
Pro plus, painkillers and the pill.

20. How many rolls of film do you need to get developed?
none but i still need to get copies of the center parcs photos from simon.

22. Your worst enemy?
Rochelle? lol.

23. What is your current desktop picture?
Nightwatch desktop... its getting really boring actually.

24. What was the last thing you said to someone?
"Are you sure you're gonna be ok?" and "Bye" to Danielle on the phone about 5 minutes ago.

26. Do you like someone?
i like several someones.

27. The last song you listened to?
i honestly can't remember cos i listened to about 3million songs i downloaded earlier. and i cant remember which one was last.
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[12 Mar 2006|11:54pm]
My parents went shopping today and bought loads of food I'm not allowed to eat. It sucks. I was searching the freezer for a microwave meal to cook when I got home from work and they were like "that's mine." or "that's laurens". So I finally found one I was allowed and went to the fridge for a snack as well (yes i am a pig, so sue me :P) and there was new Apple Strudel Mullerice, denied. Vanilla slice cakes, denied. I made myself a drink and discovered they'd had Prawn and Avocado cocktail tonight without me (they really should have washed up before I got home to hide the evidence!) so I ended up sulking lol. It was pretty funny at the time cos it was just like "This" "No" "This" "No" for about 10 minutes.

Next week I'm giving em a list. Including Chocolate custards... I've left mine in the fridge at work! That's if Danielle hasn't pinched it! Although to be fair, it was hers in the first place!

I saw Nik today. Spoke to him last night, and then today he came into Hollywood Bowl to see me. We chatted bout school a bit. I can't believe its been almost 3 years!

I've clocked sooo many hours this weekend. Did a double yesterday cos loads of people called in sick, was only gonna stay til 11 but I was well hyper on a caffeine rush (pro plus is getting mighty addictive again) and Danielle asked me to stay til 12. Which I did. then when it got to 12 i was just like "sod it, i'll stay til close" we got out at like 1.30am in the end. So I'd done 11 til 1.30am. Then was up again at 8.30 for work again. Rota'd 11-7, told Danielle I'd stay til 9 with her, we both ended up clocking out at 10.30 and staying for a drink before we went home. So that was like another 10 or 11 hours. Man I'm knackered. Also, cos I've been up there nights when I'm not working, I haven't actually been away from the place for two weeks running almost.Pretty sad really, I need to get a life.

Uni in the morning, need to write/start at least, my Reflective Journal, but I hate writing about myself. :(
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[08 Mar 2006|11:21am]
As promised, fancy dress picturoo's...

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Me as Cheerleader from Grease

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Danielle as Lara Croft

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A bunch of Superheroes!

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And another of Danielle.
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[06 Mar 2006|05:14pm]
I have such an itchy stomach and back these past few days, its really beggining to annoy me. I would say its like an allergic reaction to a fabric softenenr or something but as far as I know my mum hasn't changed the one we use. It's not all the time, just occassionally.

I'm getting better uni-wise, my reflective journal for Introduction to Film is due in next Thursday and I have like no idea what I'm going to write in it. But I have actually been attending lectures. Yay! We watched Citizen Kane this week, reminded me of when we went to Hearst Castle in California last year with the college, cos that's where most of it was shot. Other than that that film is hella boring!! We also came to the conclusion that the coursework for this module is almost identical to A Level Film Studies coursework. Which makes my life oh so much easier. We have to do a presentation and essay version of the presentation on either authorship or star studies. But thats not til like May anyway. Intro to Factual production is going well too. I'm getting well annoyed with this guy John in my production group though, he's the type of guy that wants to control everything and wants everything done his way. Which I wouldn't mind if that involved doing actual work, but it's not. His way is basically "blagging" it. But I kicked their asses into gear and we got some work done today, which I'm typing up in order to present to our lecturer before we get our asses kicked. She was pretty impressed by our blagging though! lol!

Now just gotta hope I haven't missed loadsa shit for Production Management because thats the only lecture I still haven't been too, and it's already Week 5!

Anyhow, off to el cinema with Dan tonight. I haven't been for ages so I'm making him be the dutiful boyfriend and accompany me. Don't know what we'll be seeing yet though, I just really wanted to sit in a cinema. and then we're off to Jaks afterwards! :D

Oh yeah, went to a fancy dress party on Saturday. Was pretty damn cool, I'll get Danielle to send me the photos we took of mine and some of the other costumes since I only have the one of her and I'll post em.
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[28 Feb 2006|08:40pm]
I can't believe I haven't made an entry about Center Parcs yet... Just been busy I guess. I'm getting back into the uni thing... concentrating a bit more. Well I did Monday anyway. And I got my class switched over so I'm with Nas and Tom etc for all my classes except one now, which is a lot more convinient for me anyway. I now have Tuesday's free too, but I'm not gonna ask to work them, gonna keep them free still partly cos then I can get off my arse and start driving lessons and also because Danielle nearly always has Tuesday's off, and since I don't get many shifts with her when I'm at uni it'll mean if we wanna do something I'll be free. We were all talking about going Badminton and Swimming and stuff like that since we've been to Center Parcs but I don't know whether we'll end up actually doing it.

I don't wanna whinge about Dan in here anymore, cos I feel like thats all my last few entries have been. But he's left me feeling so shitty lately, I just feel like he doesn't care sometimes. And then he has the cheek to have a go at me. It does my head in. Anyway, we argued tons yesterday and then both went to the works do. We were sort of half talking half not... but everytime he was nice to me he'd say something afterwards to piss me off. So I tried walking out but Danielle wouldn't let me leave, we all ended up playing spin the bottle in the middle of the arcades at work. Started off just a few of us, ended up everyone, like techs and managers included. Thankfully I didn't have to kiss any managers though lol. I was mostly doing it to piss Dan off I think... but anyway... I ended up inviting a bunch of people back to mine and the spin the bottle thing started up again. Dan passed out on the sofa, then all of a sudden got up and started falling over into the walls so I followed him out into the hallway and pushed him into the toilet in the process cutting his eyebrow and my finger on the artex. I didn't mean to be so violent with him but he was really pissing me off. Anyway, half an hour later Steve goes in there to check on him with me and he basically covered my downstairs toilet in puke and shit. It was not nice. So I got Steve to help me drag his ass out and kicked him onto my doorstep with a glass of water, his shoes and some tissue. I didn't let him back in. It sounds well harsh but one of the things we argued about that day was his drinking, and then he goes and makes a fool of himself like that, and a fool of me. I can't deal with him for as long as he thinks that drink can solve everything. I know I'm no angel for drinking (and to be fair I didn't exactly need his help to make a fool out of me last night) but he goes to far. Once and you learn your lesson, but for him to end up the kind of state he did last night, for a second time, is just stupid. He's an idiot. And until he gets a better attitude I'm not talking to him.

We carried on playing spin the bottle for most of the night... bunch of people left at 4ish. It was just me, Danielle and Lee left, mostly cos I begged Danielle to stay because I wanted to talk. And then I didn't really talk to her that much about it. I'm really sorry I made you stay, and for being how I was. I know I should've stopped, I just weren't exactly in the best frame of mind. You should have just given me that slap.

I knew I shouldn't have gone last night.
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[10 Feb 2006|01:18am]
I'm so bloody annoyed with Dan and I don't entirely no why. It's been going on for a while now, I've been pretty much ignoring him or trying too for two weeks. I mean basically what happened was we had a little mini arguement/sulk after Jaks the other week, I went to bed in a sulk, expecting him to come up and apoligise but he just came upstairs and got in bed. Said nothing about it and still hasn't. We went out that Thursday too and he was all sulky with me, I kissed Danielle again, whilst he wasn't there, cue more sulking. Then it's just sorta been normal for a while, then Tuesday we went Lakeside, firstly I was in a really sour mood anyway cos I felt like shit all I wanted from him was a hug or something I dunno... but we were in Danielle's car and instead of the usual "Missed you all day" or whatever that I usually get he falls asleep against the window. So I whinged at him, slightly irrational I know, but it annoyed me. Then we're all talking about Valentines day and he's all like "Oh I'm gonna be so skint after buying you're present" And we're all like "We're boycotting it, none of us can afford it cos of Center Parcs" and then he's like "i'm going to the jewellry shop, coming kayleigh?" and got pissed off when I didn't go with him because he wanted ideas. Here's an idea, don't waste money on jewelry I barely wear. It annoys me, he treats me like he would have one of his ex girlfriends, expects me to want him to spend shitloads on lavish jewellry when that really isn't me at all and he should know that. Quickest way to my heart is a bloody DVD not a diamond. Anyway, so after Lakeside we went back to Danielle's and were just watching tv and something started off a tickle fight, I told him to stop it. He wouldn't. I got really pissed off about it. Eventually he stopped. Then we were just laying there and he put his hand on my arm and stroked it and fair enough that's usually nice, but at the time it tickled me so I was like "I told you not to annoy me" and he was all "Oh forgodsake" and walked out of Danielle's house with the huff. I sent him a text caling him a sulky bastard, and he sent back "and you're not harsh na?" and I explained I was joking and he was like "didn't sound like it" and stopped texting. Since then we haven't discussed what happened at all. Danielle says his pissed off I haven't apoligised, well I'm pissed off he hasn't apoligised to me either.

I think I might be being slightly irrational and I'm aware of that. There's other things on my mind... new uni semester starting.... and other Dan things. I'm not exactly the best person to confront with commitment and sometimes Dan scares me... being with Dan scares me. He talks about marriage and kids all the time, and I'm no where near ready to give him either. But I'm scared of slipping up and ending up pregnant. It's never been an issue before obviously, and now... I'm forever worried about it. I can't get pregnant. It would ruin my life. But it just seems to be something he wants soo much, and whenever we get into the conversation it never really gets resolved, so i think the debate is sitting between us getting stagnant and making us distant with each other.

I dunno... Dan rant over.

Maybe I should just go back to having sex with women, it's so much simpler.
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[28 Jan 2006|09:29pm]
SO we've been to the Price of Wales pub for the past couple of nights, it's been pretty good. It's a lot cheaper than anywhere on Festival leisure, and the atmosphere isn't too bad. It's only a pub though, so no dancey music or actual getting to dance, but still I've had fun, just chatting away. Especially Thursday night, cos literally everyone came over after work.

We're all going to Jaks on Monday so that should be pretty fun, last time we went it was anyway. Just depends on whether certain people we don't like/don't wanna see turn up or not. Rochelle being amongst those people lol. She stopped stirring shit finally, and Dave and Dan are talking again. But I still wanna knock her out. :D Which is earning me the nickname Tyson from Vince lol.

I think Dan is getting a bit pissed off with me. I told him the truth about me and Danielle the other night, and then Simon mentioned to me the other night that he was well whinging about Wednesday and me getting so upset over Danielle going missing/running after her all night. Simon was just like "I don't know why he don't just get turned on about it like I do", and I just thought "thats because he knows its true". Or it's because he feels more threatened by another woman with me because he knows its in my history. I don't know. I just really get the feeling he's being weird with me because of it. Maybe it's something else. I asked him if anything was wrong, and he just said that he was grumpy because he's tired and worked so many shifts this week.

Anyway, I've stayed round his so much these past two weeks, that I reckon we both just need to sleep in our own beds without getting squished or getting the covers nicked or getting pushed off by the other one. Damn single beds! So yeah I'm staying at home tonight, and tomorrow night. Then we'll see what happens after Jaks on Monday.

I persuaded my parents to have Nando's takeaway tonight! :D So now I'm all full up and happy now LOL. And I downloaded/watched the first episode of LOST season 2. Squee!
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[26 Jan 2006|01:07pm]
I felt so useless last night. All I could do was cry because I couldn't make it all better. I wish I hadn't drunk so much now, then I would've been more useful for you. I hope you're ok baby. x x

Damn free cocktails!

I didn't actually make one bet. Although Dan nicked most of my money and placed bets with it. I don't really know how he did though. The last few hours are a blur, there were free cocktails til 9pm... but I didn't buy any other drinks after that, and we didn't leave til 1am. So I'm not sure where the time went... looking for Danielle, crying, Dan calming me down... not sure what order everything happened.
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[25 Jan 2006|03:34pm]
I now get my mums point, I had my exam today (went fine by the way) and I found out that the next semester doesnt start until February 6th. Which means another two weeks of lazing around doing nothing... I'm seriously running out of things to do to fill my day with lol. And its stupid, I pay lotsa money for this education and we're only bloody there for like 20 weeks a year. Seems pointless. At least when I bunk it's my decision to waste my money lol. So yeah, never thought you'd here me whinging about lack of lectures eh?

Casino tonight. Wish me luck. I'm contemplating using the LOST numbers at roulette, is it sad that I remember them from memory?
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